“People mirror back to us the reality of who we are”

I read this phrase from the book, The Third Jesus, by Deepak Chopra. Very similar to the golden rule, “Do not do unto others as you would expect they should do unto you”. So when you sit down face to face with reality, or any problems or dilemmas with people, spend some time rethinking the way you treat, react, and behave towards and around the people that you come across in life.

I need to recognize that every person is superior to me in some way, whether its knowledge of a particular subject, or level of a particular skill. I can learn and connect to a great potential source of knowledge with each person that walks past me, sits next to me in class, or that I BS with whenever.

I realize that I do love and enjoy listening to other peoples’ thoughts and opinions on life and the world. I love hearing stories and encounters from friends and strangers. Yet, I find myself not taking advantage of these opportunities that arise. I need to remember that every person is an opportunity. So next time you meet anyone new, or meet with someone you already know, seize the moment, and listen and learn whatever you can from everyone.

I am currently reading the book, Never Eat Alone, by Keith Ferrazzi, which was recommended to me by Joshua Saunders. I believe this book is a must read for any student looking to establish rewarding and successful relationships for their careers, life, etc. One chapter is about building your network before you need it. Constantly create the environment and life you want for yourself!

In the past, I told myself I will look for a job when I need one – bullshit. I now realize that its not what you know, but who you know. Sure what you know might be sufficient, but to reach the levels and places I want to reach, I have realized the importance of know some people that can help you along the way.

Point is, build your network, your team, mentors now, so when you do need something, like a job, a connection, a lead, you are ready and prepared, instead of scrambling and getting behind. Make and establish relationships with people you think can help you now, and grow that relationship, build trust, and then when the time is right, you will have help to achieve what you want.

Get to know people and potential clients as friends first. People like to do business with their friends, people they can trust and know about, not necessarily strangers. Another tip from the book is to work for these people for free, or volunteer, because eventually you’ll get noticed and these people will know your work, your value, etc. Classic example is internships. Its not a coincidence that interns eventually get hired, or have a much better chance to get the job. The people know them, have seen their work, and they know their value.

Volunteer, join organizations and clubs relative to what you are seeking. Enroll in classes, attend seminars, put yourself in the environment you want for yourself. The Law of Probability states that the more new people you meet, the more opportunities that come up.

Build your network now, before you need it! Dont wait for the life or opportunity to come to you, go out there and make it yourself. It will come a lot more naturally, and when will you will need it, you’ll have it built.

Lets face it, we all have arguments with anybody and everybody, and even with the people we love the most. Some big, alot small; arguments are typical among any human relationship. I for one, am not afraid of arguments like others I know, not because I am an Aquarius (just joking), but because I love to debate and see what others around me think or feel about anything and everything. Arguments do not have to a bad thing, or avoided. You can learn a lot about not only the other person, or the topic at hand, but you can and learn a whole lot about yourself. Its unhealthy to just forget or avoid arguments with people you care about and just bottle up your feelings inside, or even worse, momentarily forget them. Handling these situations effectively is a much needed communication skill.

I am going to write about 3 steps to handling arguments effectively. Arguments can easily be a win-win situation for both people involved. Not only can you have happier relationships, but you will solve conflicts much more efficiently without wasting emotion, time, and feeling like shit for the rest of the day. Most of all, you will be more happy and content with no regrets about your relationships.

The first step will be posted shortly, and Steps #2 and #3 will be posted throughout this week.

DISCLAIMER: This is meant to help your arguments among your own personal relationships (friends, family, GF or BF, colleagues, etc) NOT random strangers. I do not recommend wasting any time arguing with people that do not matter to you. With me personally, 99.9% of arguments with people that I am not in an actual relationship with are complete BS and offer no benefits, so I recommend avoiding these situations.