I’ve learned an awesome philosophy from one of my mentors recently. If practiced daily, it can allow you to enjoy any activity or situation you come across in life without the burden of fear, or any negative feeling and emotion; embarrassment, regret, etc. It’s especially perfect for those situations that you have always wanted to experience, but in the end, your fear wins you over and you go home.

It’s called Pre-Acceptance of Failure. It’s simple yet extremely effective if used correctly. Before you attempt to do anything, and it could be anything (playing a game or sport, approaching someone), allow yourself to pre-accept failure; acknowledge the fact that you might lose, might get rejected, basically fail. When you realize and accept this, you know you might fail, the fear of outcome is no longer a burden. The fear of outcome will not drive you nuts, make you not concentrate, make you mess up and choke. Instead, you can completely concentrate and simply do the best you can do, be the best you can be.

When you let go the fear of outcome; not knowing what might happen, you are free to just do your best. Result does not matter to you, the destination is pointless to you. What simply matters now is the experience, the journey. You always hear “Its the journey, not the destination” for a reason, and this is why.

So once you have given up your fear of outcome, the next and final step is to remove doubt. Sure you have now eliminated your fear of outcome, but you might find yourself doubting your skills, whatever. You have to remove doubt, and replace it with commitment. Picture fear as a break, and doubt holds you back. You eliminated the break, so whats left is either doubt or commitment. Commitment is complete absence of fear. So after you have eliminated the fear of outcome, all you have to next is go into whatever situation you go into with full commitment. The commitment of “I’ll do the best I can, win or lose(success or fail). Its the journey, not the destination.”

I have personally been practicing this daily. You could use this philosophy for situations basically every minute. You find yourself competing in a sport, wanting to approach a person; stranger, friend or family.

I found myself playing basketball with friends, and the fear of losing really catches up to me, and usually affects my game for the best or the worse. If I lose, I am pissed. But I’ll tell you what. When you forget about the result, pre-accept you might fail; your let loose from any fear of outcome, and you can just fucking have fun and actually enjoy the experience, win or lose. Its an amazing feeling.

Finaly do the thing you have always wanted to do. Let your boss know how you feel, approach a distant friend, any situation that you have stopped yourself from doing because of your fear of the outcome. It’s a blast and ultimate high when you can enjoy an activity with absolutely no fear – we’ve all been there. Imagine doing it everday though. I encourage you to try out the Pre-Acceptance of Failure, and let me know how it goes for you.

Flow is something I try to attain and work on every day. Flow is also referred to as “On the money” and “In a groove”. According to the definition on Wikipedia, Flow is a mental state of operation where you are fully immersed in whatever you are doing. The best example that comes to mind is sports. The best, most clear, and exhilarating moments of flow I have had in my life was during my high school basketball career. Besides sports, I have also felt it in engaging conversations, school projects, writing my thoughts, and even driving.

The father of Flow, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, lists the components of flow and also tips on how groups could flow together here.

When I think of flow, I think of passion, drive, purpose, and love. To really enjoy life to the fullest and savour the moment sort of speak, always try to find your flow, your groove in whatever it you set out to do in life. Be it your job, relationships, your home and hobbies, if you have trouble trying to find flow with it, chances are you probably could be happier doing something else. Every successful person of their trade has mastered the art of flow, from Kobe and Tiger to Mark Cuban. They find something they love to do, and excel at it.

In any situation you put yourself in in life, ask yourself the crucial and deep question: “Got Flow?”

I’m going to connect a couple posts from 2 great writers together about the rising and viable need for solitude in today’s information packed world. Ryan Holiday wrote a post about the need to demand and take time for yourself to have meditative isolation. Glenn recently commented on this particular post, and added this great thought:

So with these two great thoughts from two great writers, I will attempt to add my own spin on this. After reading “The World is Flat“, and realizing the the playing field of the world is flattening, with jobs and business (globalization) and now information, which means that everyone anywhere can be competition. For anybody to achieve great success in today’s world, having the ability to recognize the viable need for solitude is paramount. Its not who has information or knowledge, but what you can do with it, requiring innovation and imagination. You have to take solitude and really think, grasp, and learn the information you consume. Like Glenn greatly put, ” How can we, collectively, continue to prosume when we hardly have the chance to comprehend what we consume?”

To compete and succeed in the ever growing competitive world, you must take time for solitude to effectively learn and cultivate imagination and innovation with whatever information you get your hands on.

I frequently visit the website and blog of Steve Pavlina, and rediscovered an older post of something I found interesting. The blog post titled 30 Days to Success explains a great way to form new habits. Perform your new habit for 30 days straight, and then decide whether you would like to continue the habit or not after. The great thing is that after 30 days the habit will obviously be easier to maintain than starting it again. Pavlina also writes that you will not only break the addiction of the old habit during the 30 days, but the 30 days of success with the new habit will give your more confidence to continue the streak.

While working the closing shift at the gym I work at, I noticed a Sunday night regular come in with a huge gallon, maybe 2, of water. Already having drank at least 3/4 of the bottle, I asked him about it. While playing collegiate tennis a few years back at a nearby university, he started a competition among his friends of who could drink the most water each day. Turns out its a habit he has continued today, as he is now a tennis coach at another college. He also explained the numerous benefits of the habit as he admits feeling like his body is cleansed out each week by drinking the amounts of water he does.

So incorporating the 30 days to success program Steve Pavlina promotes, I will start tomorrow by drinking as much water as reasonable while breaking the habit of wasting a couple bucks a day on buying Sobe or energy drinks. I will buy a gallon or so container of water each Monday, then refill it daily for the rest of the week. I will track my progress on this blog while I also encourage you to try out the 30 days to success/New habit program for yourself.